Sunday, July 21, 2013


I've been thinking a lot about parenthood lately. My best friend is pregnant. My good friend Jen just visited with her daughter. Preston is GUNG HO on having kids...and I'm kind of like: 

That just sounds like a loooottt of work. I think if everyone had a pragmatic view of what parenthood will be like...we'd be doomed as a species. But, instead...functioning adults think to themselves:

"Why have a nice, quiet dinner together---sipping wine and talking---when we could be attending to a screaming toddler who needs to use the bathroom repeatedly and dumps his chicken on the floor??"-true story...this happened to me once in the Bahamas with my cousins. I was completely unprepared for eating out with two toddlers (BY MYSELF), who alternatively needed the restroom and refused to keep their food on their plates. I think my Aunt and Uncle set me up? Let's just say after about 20 mins...we got to-go boxes and went back to the hotel. (Frankly, I think at 22...I did pretty well to make it to 20 mins with a 2 year old and a 4 year old. Is there an award I can get for this?).

"Who wants to go home after work and kick back with a good book? Instead, we could have endless piles of laundry and dishes that we'll never get to, because the baby is crying"

"This trip to the grocery store is entirely too easy. I'd much rather be wrangling a stroller and chasing a 4 year old down the aisles or better yet!!-Dealing with a temper tantrum in the check out line!! It makes you feel ALIVE"

"These easy weekend mornings spent drinking tea in quiet solitude...BORING!! I'd rather be woken by someone jumping on my stomach demanding cereal at 5am."


Yes, yes...I know...children bring so much fulfillment and joy to your life. They improve the quality of all things. They make holidays fun and magical again. They give you a sense of accomplishment. I can see the brightsides too...but more so, I just see the screaming child in front of me in line and feel really terrible for his/her mother. Once we have the 3+ children that Preston has written into his prenup (kidding), I'm sure I'll change my tune and become completely obsessed with my child ad nauseam to all my friends/family on facebook/instagram and this blog. You can all remind me then ;) 

For now I leave you with this little gem from my friend Jen---a single mother raising a toddler. This was her answer when asked if she was dating or just focusing on her daughter:

"Well Georgia is my first priority, but I definitely need more than this relationship. I'm the bitch. She kicks me when I'm down. She OWNS me." 

hahahaha. Awesome. Thanks Jen for the perfect dose of reality!! 

Wednesday, July 17, 2013

The Men Tell All

I went to "The Bachelorette" and all I got was this t-shirt :D

I've lived in LA for 5 years and I'd NEVER been to the taping of a show!! Well, I'm happy to say that, as of yesterday...that statement is no longer true!! :) 

Preston actually runs a company that builds sets for television shows. Most of the time...this isn't really all that great. Television shows tend to be rather demanding. Television shows want you to work 15 hour days and weekends and holidays. Every now and again (ok---well, so far...just this once), television shows will give you tickets to see the live taping of "The Bachelorette: The Men Tell All"!!

I've been a faithful fan of "The Bachelor/Bachelorette" franchise for some time. It's such silly TV!! Over the years, I've gotten together with a revolving group of my friends on Monday nights to tune in for the latest drama.  We make dinner...usually potluck style...drink wine and yell at the television :D It's great fun!!

For anyone that doesn't watch the show (and thus likely lives under a rock!! JK Julie and Naomi;)), the typical timeline goes something like this:  

The Bachelor/Bachlorette meets 25 women/men who stay up all night and drink too much and make total fools of themselves in an effort to catch the attention of the object of affection.

An unlucky few go home that first night and then the rest slowly trickle away amongst grandiose 'one on one' dates, group dates and 'two on one' dates. (ONE STAYS...ONE GOES). These dates take place all over the world and involve more helicopter rides than one can count. Every single thing that happens on the show is 'the MOST dramatic EVER' or 'the MOST shocking EVER', but usually it's just another ride in a helicopter ;)

Anyway, the Bachelor/Bachelorette whittles down this group and this is when things get really interesting...and heartbreaking. As a viewer of this show, it seems pretty obvious that things are at least a little bit (if not a lot a bit ;) ) scripted. That said, I think a lot of the feelings are real. It can be quite sad and I'm not really sure why anyone would subject themselves to either a) being the one that has to choose between 2 women/men or b) date and possibly fall in love with someone that is simultaneously dating 10 other people....all the while having every action filmed. 

Finally, the Bachelor/Bachelorette has 4 women/men left and everyone visits the hometown of these women/men on 'the hometown dates'. After meeting the families of the contestants...the B/B (this is getting ridic) rips out one of their hearts and tells them to go back home into the arms of the family they just left.  

The remaining 3 gallivant around tropical islands until just 2 are left (more tears) and then the B/B chooses one and there's a proposal. More often than not...this doesn't stick. Amazingly, some HAVE.

Right around the time of the 'hometown dates', the show airs a special called "The Men/Women Tell All". This show goes behind the scenes to spill all the dirt with firsthand accounts from those that were not given a rose (read: got kicked to the curb). This is what we got tickets to yesterday!!

Unfortunately, I only got 2 just my friend Meredith and I got to go. We arrived around 11 am to board the shuttle, which left at 1145 (couldn't be late!!). We were taken to a sound stage near Hollywood.  The first thing we did was use the restroom (this show knows women!!).  Next, we went into a big sound stage and signed our life away by promising NOT to mention a THING that was said or done on the show!! We were offered a small subway sandwich and a bottle of water in exchange. :D And then we sat there. For almost 2 hours. 

Meredith and I chatted a lot with the girls with whom we had sat with on the shuttle. One of them was practically a professional audience member!! haha!! Finally, we were selectively herded onto the set of the show. It was beautiful...with a lot of drapery, flowers, candles, and purple lighting. Well done Pres ;) I believe this is ok to tell because every Bachelor set looks like this.  *Chris Harrison-PLEASE don't sue me for five million dollars!!

The woman in charge tried to sit us in a section right behind the men (from the show), but our new friend insisted on another spot. FAIL!! If we'd gone where we had first been instructed...we would have been on camera the whole time!! But, instead...we were in a literal corner (NO ONE sits Baby in a corner!!). I don't think we'll ever be seen!! LOL. It's not really the reason we went, but I can't say that being on TV wouldn't have been exciting!! Who knows? Maybe there will be some surprising cut away shots of us. 

We got to watch the episode that would be airing that night and then the taping began. They had us warm up with lots of clapping and smiling and practicing different facial expressions. Pretty funny :) And then we sat there...and sat there and sat there. All in all...I think we were in those chairs for 6 hours or so!! Thank God we brought snacks!! Meredith and I were stuffing hard boiled eggs into our mouths with every 30 second break in shooting!! Hehe!! Bathroom breaks were few and far between. It was absolutely FREEZING in there. We just sat and smiled and reacted and clapped and clapped and clapped for SIX hours. It was intense and a VERY long day. One thing I learned about myself is that I have no "WOOOO" voice. I can't hit that octave!! My woo is very broken and crackly. I feel terrible for the sound person who will have to edit out my struggling cries of excitement.  AND I was RIGHT next to a mic!! hahah!! 

We left around 830pm with sore bums, hoarse voices, tired cheeks, tingling hands, and empty stomachs.  I could not WAIT to get back to the car and my cell phone!! We were not allowed to bring any electronics with us to the set. It's sad how difficult this was ;)

Overall, I'm glad we got to experience this. It was very cool to see how the show is taped and to see the 'stars' up close. Chris Harrison (the host of the show) was very funny and nice.  We got to see quite a bit of drama and had some laughs. It was a verrrryyy long, but fun day!!

We rewarded ourselves for all of our hard work with a Cheesecake Factory feast at 10pm on the water in Marina Del Rey. Life in LA is good ;) 

And now-since I couldn't take any pictures of the experience-I'll leave you with some pics of my super hot husband to be :D


Thursday, July 11, 2013

Judgy Wudgy

I'd like to say that I've never been judgmental of a bride, but I have. Why make such a BIG deal over such a small thing?? I truly TRULY never thought I'd be one of 'those' brides. But, then I met a man that wanted a wedding...and he talked me into wanting a wedding...and so we (mostly I) began planning a wedding. I can't say it's not fun...because it IS fun, but it's also a lot of work (as I've previously said).

Every. Single. Thing. needs a decision made. I mean, the decisions do NOT matter. In some way though, it's this fact that makes the decisions even more hard to make...because they do NOT matter. Should I capitalize all the letters of this phrase? Should I capitalize just the first letters in the phrase? Should I capitalize none of the letters in this phrase? These decisions are being made after agonizing over fonts with names like "Eat Pray Love" or "Swan" What does that even mean?? Slowly, start to go a little insane. You don't want to have to make these silly decisions...but you DO; they HAVE to be made. The printer wants to know!! 

It truly starts to consume you. And there is drama!! Oh wow, is there drama!! Even when you think...I will be having no drama at my wedding (stamps foots)...there it is...sneaking in the back door and under the tent flaps. Drama will crash your party. Feelings will be hurt. True and not so true friends will be revealed. It's like an exciting mini series. I've yet to hear of a wedding lacking in any drama. One of my best friends is attending a wedding this weekend that is in the midst of some drama. I told her it sounded like there might be a brawl and she said, "that's why I'm definitely wearing pants". Awesome.

Decision decisions decisions and many many many tasks. And the expense!! Oh, the expense!! I used to think..."Are you insane? You spent that much on THAT?!" and then you get into it...and you know what? that's just what THAT costs and there's no way around it and good luck not getting THAT. 

And the politics...someone will be hurt; someone will assume something; EVERYONE will have an opinion.

I'm not complaining...this has truly been an eye opening experience for me. It's great, because it has served to make me less judgmental and more mindful. I think it's kind of a "you dont' know till you know" sort of thing.

So, next time you see a bride and she seems a little on edge and might talk extensively about her wedding...just smile and nod and try to remember that she just had to cut her cousins from her guest list and has spent the last 48 hours thinking about forks. 

Sunday, July 7, 2013

The Story of the Key

THE key.

As you know, Preston got a 'new' 30 year old car a few weeks ago. Well, this car came with TWO keys. I'm not sure I'm fully understanding...but one of these keys is in a leather pouch...and it opens the doors and the trunk. You need to get into the trunk, you see, to open the gas tank. I'm not sure what kind of trickery of German engineering this is, but the key? Well, it's pretty important. 

So, on 4th of July...Pres goes to get some things out of the trunk. Upon his return, he packs his bag for the pool party we were attending...and in the process realizes he doesn't have the key. So, he starts to look around for the key and can't find it. We look EVERYWHERE. He was (understandably) quite frantic about it. He walked back up the street to his car and tore it apart looking for this key. We went through the entire apartment...even looking in drawers and cupboards. No key.

The next day at work...through more car stuff I don't understand...he uses some sort of air pressure to get the trunk to open to make sure that they key is not wasn't :-/

This man has a one track mind, sometimes, when something is bothering him and we spent hours again looking for this key. We took a long walk looking all over the ground and retracing his steps. No key :-/

We went to bed defeated. Luckly, Preston had enough gas to drive for a while...but very soon he was going to have to get a rather expensive replacement for this key. The car is 30 years old, afterall...those parts aren't cheap.

Yesterday morning...Pres went out to his car to make a run to Starbucks for his coffee. The driver's side door is open (he had, of course, locked it) and the key is sitting right in the middle of the seat. I. am. AMAZED!!

Preston had moved the car mulitple times since the 4th. Someone had clearly found the Mercedes' key and just tried it on cars until they found the right one...and then left it on the seat without touching another thing in the car.

My heart swells to know that there are still kind and good people in the world that would go out of their way for a stranger. This is one of the reasons I love living in Belmont Shore. We are so grateful and thankful to this amazing person.